You need to fix this quickly, or I’m moving to the Dish Network.

We had an exciting evening of severe weather in Tennessee yesterday, which is always problematic for those of us who are trying to watch network television. The local affiliates interrupt programming for wall-to-wall coverage when things get rough, and we appreciate that. Of course, they overdo it, but at least they’ve got current information and radars and such.

You, on the other hand, are a significant and dangerous irritant during times like these on digital cable, because you interrupt their interruptions with 1950s style Emergency Broadcast System warnings. Think about it for a minute, you idiots. Here we have competency during a Tornado warning swept away by your commandeering the picture and sound with relentless beeping and a twice-repeated crawl. Just as the meteorologist is about to zoom in on my neighborhood, your automated bullshit robs me of the moment. WTF?

And there’s nowhere to hide from this in your digital world either. For God’s sake, you fucking morons, this is the 21st Century! We have technology that will serve your needs and the needs of the government without hijacking the transmission.

What’ll it take? Somebody’s going to sue your ass for blocking their access to real life-saving information.

Sheesh.

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